Your access to this site has been limited #date #dating


#christian online dating

#

Your access to this site has been limited

Your access to this service has been temporarily limited. Please try again in a few minutes. (HTTP response code 503)

Reason: Access from your area has been temporarily limited for security reasons

Important note for site admins: If you are the administrator of this website note that your access has been limited because you broke one of the Wordfence firewall rules. The reason you access was limited is: “Access from your area has been temporarily limited for security reasons”.

If this is a false positive, meaning that your access to your own site has been limited incorrectly, then you will need to regain access to your site, go to the Wordfence “options” page, go to the section for Firewall Rules and disable the rule that caused you to be blocked. For example, if you were blocked because it was detected that you are a fake Google crawler, then disable the rule that blocks fake google crawlers. Or if you were blocked because you were accessing your site too quickly, then increase the number of accesses allowed per minute.

If you’re still having trouble, then simply disable the Wordfence firewall and you will still benefit from the other security features that Wordfence provides.

If you are a site administrator and have been accidentally locked out, please enter your email in the box below and click “Send”. If the email address you enter belongs to a known site administrator or someone set to receive Wordfence alerts, we will send you an email to help you regain access. Please read our FAQ if this does not work.

This response was generated by Wordfence.


Social Media Site Usage 2014 #what #has #made #the #internet #so #popular


#

Social Media Update 2014

While Facebook remains the most popular site, other platforms see higher rates of growth

In a new survey conducted in September 2014, the Pew Research Center finds that Facebook remains by far the most popular social media site. While its growth has slowed, the level of user engagement with the platform has increased. Other platforms like Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and LinkedIn saw significant increases over the past year in the proportion of online adults who now use their sites.

The results in this report are based on American adults who use the internet. 1 Other key findings:

While Facebook remains the most popular social media site, its overall growth has slowed and other sites continue to see increases in usership.

Facebook continues to be the most popular social media site, but its membership saw little change from 2013. The one notable exception is older adults: For the first time in Pew Research findings, more than half (56%) of internet users ages 65 and older use Facebook. Overall, 71% of internet users are on Facebook, a proportion that represents no change from August 2013.

Every other social media platform measured saw significant growth between 2013 and 2014. Instagram not only increased its overall user figure by nine percentage points, but also saw significant growth in almost every demographic group. LinkedIn continued to grow among groups with which it was already popular, such as professionals and college graduates, while Twitter and Pinterest saw increases in usership across a variety of demographic groups.

The engagement of Facebook users continues to grow, while daily use on other platforms shows little change.

Facebook’s large base of users continues to be very active. Fully 70% engage with the site daily (and 45% do so several times a day), a significant increase from the 63% who did so in 2013. About half (49%) of Instagram users and 17% of Pinterest users engage with their respective platforms daily, although neither of these represent a significant change from 2013. Some 36% of Twitter users visit the site daily, but this actually represents a 10-point decrease from the 46% who did so in 2013. While the 13% of LinkedIn users who engage with the platform daily is unchanged from 2013, the proportion of users who use the site weekly or less often increased significantly—that is, more users log on less frequently.

52% of online adults use multiple social media sites. Facebook acts as “home base” — it remains the most popular site for those who only use one, and has significant overlap with other platforms.

Fully 52% of online adults use two or more social media sites, a significant increase from the 42% who did so in 2013. At the same time, significantly fewer adults use just one site — 28% compared with 36% last year. As in 2013, Facebook remains the most popular site among those who use only one — fully 79% of those who use just one site report using Facebook. As in years past, a significant majority of Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and LinkedIn users say they also use Facebook, more than any other site. At the same time, the proportion of Facebook users who also use another site is on the rise — that is, there are more Facebook users this year who also use Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and LinkedIn than there were in 2013.

Social media users in the entire adult population

The results of this report are primarily focused on all internet users. In the corresponding table, the usage figures of the five social networking platforms measured are presented as a proportion of the total American adult population.

About this survey

The findings reported here were collected in omnibus surveys underwritten by the University of Michigan. The survey questions were designed in consultation with Dr. Nicole Ellison and Dr. Cliff Lampe from the University of Michigan’s School of Information. Further reports with more details about how people use social media will be produced later this year.

The results are based on data from telephone interviews conducted by Princeton Survey Research Associates International from September 11 to September 14, 2014 and September 18 to September 21, 2014. Telephone interviews were conducted in English and Spanish by landline (1,002) and cell phone (1,001, including 594 without a landline phone). For results based on the total sample, one can say with 95% confidence that the error attributable to sampling is plus or minus 2.5 percentage points. For results based on Internet users (n=1,597), the margin of sampling error is plus or minus 2.9 percentage points.

  1. The percentage of U.S. adults who say they use the internet or email has fluctuated somewhat from survey to survey. This September 2014 survey found that 81% of adults use the internet or email at least occasionally, while 87% reported the same in a comparable omnibus survey fielded in January 2014.

Pagination


11 Things Dating in New York City Has Taught Me #dating #sites #uk


#nyc dating

#

11 Things Dating in New York City Has Taught Me

I came to New York City as a single girl. I was part of the generation of young women who lived and breathed by the lessons of Sex and the City. so I was of the delusional notion that I’d land my very own Mr. Big in no time. Oh, how cruel reality can be.

My career was always at the forefront, but since I’m a living, breathing human, it was also my intention to land a partner at some point. It wasn’t necessary to my existence, but definitely something I wanted. So, like any single woman in the city, I went through the motions of dating, having flings and a couple of short relationships in the hopes of finding “the one.” Before I met my fiancé — not in New York City mind you — I had been dating in this town for almost ten years; ten long and arduous years of ups and downs, drama, tears, joy and the rest of it.

It’s not easy to date in New York. New Yorkers have a different idea of what love is, and for a lot of us, it’s not even a priority until later on in the game. However, with the chapter of my dating life officially closed (I hope), I like to think I learned a couple things.

1. You’ll get stood up at some point.

It will probably take you days, if not weeks, to admit to your friends that it happened, but it’s a fact: you will be stood up. In most cases it will be because the person you’re supposed to meet was pushed into the date in the first place. No matter the particulars, remember that you’re not the one to blame.

2. Treatment of servers says everything.

If your date treats a waiter, or anyone in the service industry for that matter, like they’re even remotely beneath him, then bail. The biggest red flag in the dating world is poor treatment of servers. It’s unforgivable.

3. You’ll make a scene in public.

There are a lot of options in NYC and many approach this by dating more than one person at the same time. It’s not easy to run into someone you thought you were ready to get serious with when he’s out on a date with someone else. Try to keep the throwing of wine glasses to a minimum; it can get pretty pricey after three or four.

4. Texts don’t have subliminal messages.

“What are you doing Friday?” is not code for something else, nor is “I had a good time last night.” And, before you drive yourself mad, “good” isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Granted, “great” would both look and sound better, but remember that not everyone has the vast vocabulary that you do.

5. You’ll try online dating eventually .

Even if you’re one of those people who is adamantly against it, you’ll try the online dating scene at least once. I was on OKCupid for all of one week. It was, for lack of a better word, depressing. But think of it this way — you’ll probably find your next job through some sort of professional or social contact or referral, but you might as well apply for jobs online too, right? Same is true of finding a mate — especially in a huge city like NYC.

6. You’ll always find an SATC scenario that fits your dating life.

If you’re part of the Sex and the City generation like me, you will never be free of relating your dating woes to those of Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda. You’ll find that the parallels are often uncanny. However, no one will chase you to Paris. I know, because I tried that one.

7. You’ll be a repeat offender.

Yes, you will meet a douchebag, get screwed over by him, and then go back for more. You will do this more times than you’ll admit. You’ll also have him on speed dial for drunken booty calls, although you won’t tell a soul this — not even your therapist to whom you pay $100 a session after insurance.

8. You’re likely to “love” with one foot out the door.

New York is a city of 8 million people, so it’s hard not to assume that there might be someone better out there for you. This isn’t wrong, rude or even a bad thing. Curiosity may kill cats, kittens and other felines, but it’s also very human. Even in your most smitten of states, you’ll wonder, “Can there be more than this?”

9. You’ll definitely date someone else’s sloppy seconds.

If you’ve dated within your professional and personal circles, which you obviously have, it is more than likely you’ll find yourself on a date with someone else’s ex, either knowingly or unknowingly. The term “sloppy seconds” isn’t a pretty one, but because it’s unavoidable, you may want to come up with a flowery euphemism for it instead.

10. You should avoid people who say they’re in an open relationship.

If there’s anything I’ve learned, and learned the hard way, it’s that people in open relationships are a tricky breed. While I don’t knock their choices, I can attest to the fact that everyone I’ve had, er, “run-ins” with were actually not in an open relationship at all. They were just straight-up cheaters. Not cool. Besides, even if they claim their open relationship is legit, that doesn’t bode well for your long-term prospects.

11. You really can’t change people.

Go ahead and try, try again. You can’t change people, you can’t fix wounded birds, you can’t save people from themselves, and you especially shouldn’t sacrifice who you are because of someone else’s shit. So, quit it, Florence Nightingale.


Jana Duggar Dating Secrets Revealed, 19 Kids And Counting – Star Has Reportedly Refused To Enter Courtship #online #personals


#dating secrets

#

Jana Duggar Dating Secrets Revealed, ’19 Kids And Counting’ Star Has Reportedly Refused To Enter Courtship

Jana Duggar (second from left) with her sisters (left to right) Joy, Jill, Jessa and Jinger in Season 8 of “19 Kids and Counting.” Photo: TLC

“19 Kids and Counting” viewers have long since wondered why Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar’s oldest daughter, Jana Duggar, has yet to settle down. Despite speculation that Jana, 25, has been too busy serving her many siblings to find a partner, Radar Online reports that the reality star has simply yet to meet her perfect future husband.

“Jana has been pursued by several guys,” a insider reportedly close to the Duggar family told the site. Despite her ability to attract Christian men, viewers shouldn’t expect Jana to walk down the aisle anytime soon. “She has never gotten to the courting phase with anyone, but she has spoken with interested men after church,” an insider said.

Unlike her sisters Jill, 23, who tied the knot with Derick Dillard, 25, in June, and Jessa. 22, who married Ben Seewald, 19, in November, Jana reportedly has turned down at least two potential suitors. “The problem is that Jana’s extremely picky,” said a source when speaking about the men who have tried to begin an official courtship. “She wants the real deal and won’t settle for less.”

Jana was last rumored to be seeing former NFL quarterback Tim Tebow, 27. Following several reports of their alleged courtship, a rep for Tebow confirmed that his client had “never even met” the TLC star. Jana’s cousin and co-star, Amy Duggar, 28, also added her own two cents about the dating rumors after Star magazine published claims she was trying to steal the former athlete away.

“Jana and I laughed so hard about this,” Amy said on Instagram, referencing the magazine’s report. “We’ve never even met Tim Tebow. #allsmilesnodrama.”

Rumors of Jana’s courtship with the Christian athlete first came to light in December after Jim Bob and Michelle were photographed with Tebow’s mom, Pam. The photo op took place at a Loving Choices Pregnancy Centers fundraiser near the Duggars’ home in Tontitown, Arkansas.

Jana and the rest of the Duggar family are currently filming Season 9 of “19 Kids and Counting.” The series returns to TLC Tuesday, Feb. 17.


Why Tinder Has Us Addicted: The Dating App Gives You Mind-Reading Powers #best #internet #dating #sites


#singles dating app

#

Why Tinder Has Us Addicted: The Dating App Gives You Mind-Reading Powers

Tinder. a dating app for the iPhone, has become so wildly popular in the six months since its launch that it’s already spawned its own malady: Tinderitis, or the sensation of having a sore thumb from swiping to approve or reject the faces of people offered up as potential date material.

Tinder has lured people in by unabashedly offering a place to do all the things we love doing online, but won’t admit to: act shallow, make snap-judgments based on looks, obsess over what people think of us and boost our egos. It’s turned passing judgment into a pastime, and people are thrilled to take part.

“People don’t think of [Tinder] as online dating, they think of it as a game,” said Rachel Ellicott, a sophomore at Cornell University who downloaded the app earlier this winter after hearing about it from friends at other schools. “I think of it as a beauty contest plus messaging.”

Tinder, which first launched at a University of Southern California party and expanded to other college campuses from there. is part HotOrNot.com — a site that lets people rate strangers’ appearance — and part “f*ck, chuck, marry” — the high-school sleepover game that makes players pick which they’d do to three people. After signing in with Facebook, Tinder users are shown singles nearby, then asked to “like” or say “nope” to a potential match based on a few postage stamp-sized photos and some scant details about mutual interests and friends. Only if two people both “like” each other are they allowed to message, reducing the barrage of messages women often receive on other online dating services.

Though Tinder co-founder Justin Mateen declined to specify how many active users the app has attracted, he said the iPhone app is currently being downloaded 10,000 to 20,000 times a day. Sixty percent of users check it daily, with many consulting the app five to six times a day, Mateen added.

The secret to Tinder’s success is a small circle that appears below each photo: The “X” button. In a social media world rampant with “likes,” “hearts,” “favorites” and “thumbs ups” designed to ensure everyone gets along, Tinder actually encourages people to pass judgment in a superficial way. That, however unkind it may seem, holds real allure. In some ways, it’s even refreshing.

Judging on Tinder is “mostly based on looks,” acknowledged Nikki Blank, a Tufts University sophomore who’s helped Tinder with its outreach on campus. “I think it’s definitely part of the appeal, though. And it’s socially acceptable under the guidelines of [the app’s] rules.”

Tinder is like The Facebook before it became Facebook: a pure, unadulterated means of dissecting people’s physical appearances, with no extra details about recent articles read or apps used to slow down the judging process. Tinder makes the scrutiny even more streamlined than on Facebook and doesn’t try to disguise it — making the app wildly popular and intoxicatingly enjoyable.

This online dating app is really a judging app, and Tinderers have responded to the app’s rules by rating each other over 3 billion times in six months. The app’s creators have cleverly designed Tinder to make rating both faster and, in a subtle way, more literal. Instead of tapping a big red “X” to pass over someone, Tinderers can flick the photo aside, as if the person has been summarily dismissed, banished with a wave of the hand.

All that mutual rating, those billions of taps and flicks, has allowed Tinder to tap into the Holy Grail of what people seek to know about the world: who’s attracted to them among the subset of people they’re attracted to.

The startup has used technology to uncover and help us communicate our attraction to each other, information that because of our egos, social norms and general inter-personal awkwardness, we’ve almost always kept locked up. Tinder offers the digital equivalent of stepping into a party and immediately knowing which of the people you find attractive think you’re good looking, too. It’s as if singles suddenly had mind-reading super-powers.

Being rated, for many of its users, actually seems to feel good. Instead of receiving lascivious compliments from faceless strangers sent to OKCupid inboxes or via Facebook Messages, Tinderers get to learn if people they find cute like them back. At the same time, there’s little fear of suffering the sting of rejection. Because Tinder appears to show people at random, there’s the plausible excuse that if a handsome stranger hasn’t liked you back, it’s simply because he hasn’t come across your photo.

“It’s become an ego boost,” said Ellicott. “I downloaded it just to appease my guy friend, but ended up getting addicted to it because it’s like, ‘Oh, a cute guy in my class likes me back!'”

Blank agrees, noting her peers have used Tinder “more as an ego boost-type situation than a dating situation or a way to connect with people.”

Tinder’s rapid rise has worried some, who argue it feeds our shallow inclinations.

“It grants permission for those in our culture to rate others based on physical appearance, and furthermore, it teaches us how to slash an ‘X’ on those we find unattractive (too old, too short, too much facial hair),” lamented Carlina Duan, a contributor to the University of Michigan’s Michigan Daily student newspaper, in a story about Tinder. “It teaches us that dating, then, is a process of physical attraction and only physical attraction.”

It’s a fair criticism. But it may actually be the “likes,” not the “X’s,” that offer more cause for concern.

Tinder is telling people things they wouldn’t have learned otherwise, and wouldn’t have learned offline. It reveals the Ryan Gosling-lookalike down the street thinks you’re hot, the cute girl in Starbucks likes you back or that the guy you’ve checked out in class has eyed you back.

That deeply personal, useful and instantly gratifying information makes Tinder an addictive experience, with each match fueling a kind of emotional high. Research has shown “likes” on Facebook and retweets and Twitter can release a dopamine surge that, in some cases, lead to social media addiction. Now imagine the chemical effect of immediate e-feedback that’s even more personal: While Facebook tells you if someone liked your status update, Tinder tells you if someone likes you. How soon will it be before people go from enjoying that feeling to craving it?

Tinder’s popularity both underscores and feeds an obsession with constant acknowledgment and approval. It suggests we’re all but starving for likes, eager for affirmation, and will no doubt be suffering even more acute Tinderitis in our push to figure out which strangers, and how many, think we’re hot.


Your access to this site has been limited #free #online #dating


#christian online dating

#

Your access to this site has been limited

Your access to this service has been temporarily limited. Please try again in a few minutes. (HTTP response code 503)

Reason: Access from your area has been temporarily limited for security reasons

Important note for site admins: If you are the administrator of this website note that your access has been limited because you broke one of the Wordfence firewall rules. The reason you access was limited is: “Access from your area has been temporarily limited for security reasons”.

If this is a false positive, meaning that your access to your own site has been limited incorrectly, then you will need to regain access to your site, go to the Wordfence “options” page, go to the section for Firewall Rules and disable the rule that caused you to be blocked. For example, if you were blocked because it was detected that you are a fake Google crawler, then disable the rule that blocks fake google crawlers. Or if you were blocked because you were accessing your site too quickly, then increase the number of accesses allowed per minute.

If you’re still having trouble, then simply disable the Wordfence firewall and you will still benefit from the other security features that Wordfence provides.

If you are a site administrator and have been accidentally locked out, please enter your email in the box below and click “Send”. If the email address you enter belongs to a known site administrator or someone set to receive Wordfence alerts, we will send you an email to help you regain access. Please read our FAQ if this does not work.

This response was generated by Wordfence.


11 Things Dating in New York City Has Taught Me #dating #agency


#nyc dating

#

11 Things Dating in New York City Has Taught Me

I came to New York City as a single girl. I was part of the generation of young women who lived and breathed by the lessons of Sex and the City. so I was of the delusional notion that I’d land my very own Mr. Big in no time. Oh, how cruel reality can be.

My career was always at the forefront, but since I’m a living, breathing human, it was also my intention to land a partner at some point. It wasn’t necessary to my existence, but definitely something I wanted. So, like any single woman in the city, I went through the motions of dating, having flings and a couple of short relationships in the hopes of finding “the one.” Before I met my fiancé — not in New York City mind you — I had been dating in this town for almost ten years; ten long and arduous years of ups and downs, drama, tears, joy and the rest of it.

It’s not easy to date in New York. New Yorkers have a different idea of what love is, and for a lot of us, it’s not even a priority until later on in the game. However, with the chapter of my dating life officially closed (I hope), I like to think I learned a couple things.

1. You’ll get stood up at some point.

It will probably take you days, if not weeks, to admit to your friends that it happened, but it’s a fact: you will be stood up. In most cases it will be because the person you’re supposed to meet was pushed into the date in the first place. No matter the particulars, remember that you’re not the one to blame.

2. Treatment of servers says everything.

If your date treats a waiter, or anyone in the service industry for that matter, like they’re even remotely beneath him, then bail. The biggest red flag in the dating world is poor treatment of servers. It’s unforgivable.

3. You’ll make a scene in public.

There are a lot of options in NYC and many approach this by dating more than one person at the same time. It’s not easy to run into someone you thought you were ready to get serious with when he’s out on a date with someone else. Try to keep the throwing of wine glasses to a minimum; it can get pretty pricey after three or four.

4. Texts don’t have subliminal messages.

“What are you doing Friday?” is not code for something else, nor is “I had a good time last night.” And, before you drive yourself mad, “good” isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Granted, “great” would both look and sound better, but remember that not everyone has the vast vocabulary that you do.

5. You’ll try online dating eventually .

Even if you’re one of those people who is adamantly against it, you’ll try the online dating scene at least once. I was on OKCupid for all of one week. It was, for lack of a better word, depressing. But think of it this way — you’ll probably find your next job through some sort of professional or social contact or referral, but you might as well apply for jobs online too, right? Same is true of finding a mate — especially in a huge city like NYC.

6. You’ll always find an SATC scenario that fits your dating life.

If you’re part of the Sex and the City generation like me, you will never be free of relating your dating woes to those of Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda. You’ll find that the parallels are often uncanny. However, no one will chase you to Paris. I know, because I tried that one.

7. You’ll be a repeat offender.

Yes, you will meet a douchebag, get screwed over by him, and then go back for more. You will do this more times than you’ll admit. You’ll also have him on speed dial for drunken booty calls, although you won’t tell a soul this — not even your therapist to whom you pay $100 a session after insurance.

8. You’re likely to “love” with one foot out the door.

New York is a city of 8 million people, so it’s hard not to assume that there might be someone better out there for you. This isn’t wrong, rude or even a bad thing. Curiosity may kill cats, kittens and other felines, but it’s also very human. Even in your most smitten of states, you’ll wonder, “Can there be more than this?”

9. You’ll definitely date someone else’s sloppy seconds.

If you’ve dated within your professional and personal circles, which you obviously have, it is more than likely you’ll find yourself on a date with someone else’s ex, either knowingly or unknowingly. The term “sloppy seconds” isn’t a pretty one, but because it’s unavoidable, you may want to come up with a flowery euphemism for it instead.

10. You should avoid people who say they’re in an open relationship.

If there’s anything I’ve learned, and learned the hard way, it’s that people in open relationships are a tricky breed. While I don’t knock their choices, I can attest to the fact that everyone I’ve had, er, “run-ins” with were actually not in an open relationship at all. They were just straight-up cheaters. Not cool. Besides, even if they claim their open relationship is legit, that doesn’t bode well for your long-term prospects.

11. You really can’t change people.

Go ahead and try, try again. You can’t change people, you can’t fix wounded birds, you can’t save people from themselves, and you especially shouldn’t sacrifice who you are because of someone else’s shit. So, quit it, Florence Nightingale.


Jana Duggar Dating Secrets Revealed, 19 Kids And Counting – Star Has Reportedly Refused To Enter Courtship #local #dating #service


#dating secrets

#

Jana Duggar Dating Secrets Revealed, ’19 Kids And Counting’ Star Has Reportedly Refused To Enter Courtship

Jana Duggar (second from left) with her sisters (left to right) Joy, Jill, Jessa and Jinger in Season 8 of “19 Kids and Counting.” Photo: TLC

“19 Kids and Counting” viewers have long since wondered why Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar’s oldest daughter, Jana Duggar, has yet to settle down. Despite speculation that Jana, 25, has been too busy serving her many siblings to find a partner, Radar Online reports that the reality star has simply yet to meet her perfect future husband.

“Jana has been pursued by several guys,” a insider reportedly close to the Duggar family told the site. Despite her ability to attract Christian men, viewers shouldn’t expect Jana to walk down the aisle anytime soon. “She has never gotten to the courting phase with anyone, but she has spoken with interested men after church,” an insider said.

Unlike her sisters Jill, 23, who tied the knot with Derick Dillard, 25, in June, and Jessa. 22, who married Ben Seewald, 19, in November, Jana reportedly has turned down at least two potential suitors. “The problem is that Jana’s extremely picky,” said a source when speaking about the men who have tried to begin an official courtship. “She wants the real deal and won’t settle for less.”

Jana was last rumored to be seeing former NFL quarterback Tim Tebow, 27. Following several reports of their alleged courtship, a rep for Tebow confirmed that his client had “never even met” the TLC star. Jana’s cousin and co-star, Amy Duggar, 28, also added her own two cents about the dating rumors after Star magazine published claims she was trying to steal the former athlete away.

“Jana and I laughed so hard about this,” Amy said on Instagram, referencing the magazine’s report. “We’ve never even met Tim Tebow. #allsmilesnodrama.”

Rumors of Jana’s courtship with the Christian athlete first came to light in December after Jim Bob and Michelle were photographed with Tebow’s mom, Pam. The photo op took place at a Loving Choices Pregnancy Centers fundraiser near the Duggars’ home in Tontitown, Arkansas.

Jana and the rest of the Duggar family are currently filming Season 9 of “19 Kids and Counting.” The series returns to TLC Tuesday, Feb. 17.


Why Tinder Has Us Addicted: The Dating App Gives You Mind-Reading Powers #single #people


#singles dating app

#

Why Tinder Has Us Addicted: The Dating App Gives You Mind-Reading Powers

Tinder. a dating app for the iPhone, has become so wildly popular in the six months since its launch that it’s already spawned its own malady: Tinderitis, or the sensation of having a sore thumb from swiping to approve or reject the faces of people offered up as potential date material.

Tinder has lured people in by unabashedly offering a place to do all the things we love doing online, but won’t admit to: act shallow, make snap-judgments based on looks, obsess over what people think of us and boost our egos. It’s turned passing judgment into a pastime, and people are thrilled to take part.

“People don’t think of [Tinder] as online dating, they think of it as a game,” said Rachel Ellicott, a sophomore at Cornell University who downloaded the app earlier this winter after hearing about it from friends at other schools. “I think of it as a beauty contest plus messaging.”

Tinder, which first launched at a University of Southern California party and expanded to other college campuses from there. is part HotOrNot.com — a site that lets people rate strangers’ appearance — and part “f*ck, chuck, marry” — the high-school sleepover game that makes players pick which they’d do to three people. After signing in with Facebook, Tinder users are shown singles nearby, then asked to “like” or say “nope” to a potential match based on a few postage stamp-sized photos and some scant details about mutual interests and friends. Only if two people both “like” each other are they allowed to message, reducing the barrage of messages women often receive on other online dating services.

Though Tinder co-founder Justin Mateen declined to specify how many active users the app has attracted, he said the iPhone app is currently being downloaded 10,000 to 20,000 times a day. Sixty percent of users check it daily, with many consulting the app five to six times a day, Mateen added.

The secret to Tinder’s success is a small circle that appears below each photo: The “X” button. In a social media world rampant with “likes,” “hearts,” “favorites” and “thumbs ups” designed to ensure everyone gets along, Tinder actually encourages people to pass judgment in a superficial way. That, however unkind it may seem, holds real allure. In some ways, it’s even refreshing.

Judging on Tinder is “mostly based on looks,” acknowledged Nikki Blank, a Tufts University sophomore who’s helped Tinder with its outreach on campus. “I think it’s definitely part of the appeal, though. And it’s socially acceptable under the guidelines of [the app’s] rules.”

Tinder is like The Facebook before it became Facebook: a pure, unadulterated means of dissecting people’s physical appearances, with no extra details about recent articles read or apps used to slow down the judging process. Tinder makes the scrutiny even more streamlined than on Facebook and doesn’t try to disguise it — making the app wildly popular and intoxicatingly enjoyable.

This online dating app is really a judging app, and Tinderers have responded to the app’s rules by rating each other over 3 billion times in six months. The app’s creators have cleverly designed Tinder to make rating both faster and, in a subtle way, more literal. Instead of tapping a big red “X” to pass over someone, Tinderers can flick the photo aside, as if the person has been summarily dismissed, banished with a wave of the hand.

All that mutual rating, those billions of taps and flicks, has allowed Tinder to tap into the Holy Grail of what people seek to know about the world: who’s attracted to them among the subset of people they’re attracted to.

The startup has used technology to uncover and help us communicate our attraction to each other, information that because of our egos, social norms and general inter-personal awkwardness, we’ve almost always kept locked up. Tinder offers the digital equivalent of stepping into a party and immediately knowing which of the people you find attractive think you’re good looking, too. It’s as if singles suddenly had mind-reading super-powers.

Being rated, for many of its users, actually seems to feel good. Instead of receiving lascivious compliments from faceless strangers sent to OKCupid inboxes or via Facebook Messages, Tinderers get to learn if people they find cute like them back. At the same time, there’s little fear of suffering the sting of rejection. Because Tinder appears to show people at random, there’s the plausible excuse that if a handsome stranger hasn’t liked you back, it’s simply because he hasn’t come across your photo.

“It’s become an ego boost,” said Ellicott. “I downloaded it just to appease my guy friend, but ended up getting addicted to it because it’s like, ‘Oh, a cute guy in my class likes me back!'”

Blank agrees, noting her peers have used Tinder “more as an ego boost-type situation than a dating situation or a way to connect with people.”

Tinder’s rapid rise has worried some, who argue it feeds our shallow inclinations.

“It grants permission for those in our culture to rate others based on physical appearance, and furthermore, it teaches us how to slash an ‘X’ on those we find unattractive (too old, too short, too much facial hair),” lamented Carlina Duan, a contributor to the University of Michigan’s Michigan Daily student newspaper, in a story about Tinder. “It teaches us that dating, then, is a process of physical attraction and only physical attraction.”

It’s a fair criticism. But it may actually be the “likes,” not the “X’s,” that offer more cause for concern.

Tinder is telling people things they wouldn’t have learned otherwise, and wouldn’t have learned offline. It reveals the Ryan Gosling-lookalike down the street thinks you’re hot, the cute girl in Starbucks likes you back or that the guy you’ve checked out in class has eyed you back.

That deeply personal, useful and instantly gratifying information makes Tinder an addictive experience, with each match fueling a kind of emotional high. Research has shown “likes” on Facebook and retweets and Twitter can release a dopamine surge that, in some cases, lead to social media addiction. Now imagine the chemical effect of immediate e-feedback that’s even more personal: While Facebook tells you if someone liked your status update, Tinder tells you if someone likes you. How soon will it be before people go from enjoying that feeling to craving it?

Tinder’s popularity both underscores and feeds an obsession with constant acknowledgment and approval. It suggests we’re all but starving for likes, eager for affirmation, and will no doubt be suffering even more acute Tinderitis in our push to figure out which strangers, and how many, think we’re hot.